A week later and I feel fine.

Usually by this time I’ve already messaged my ex and let my BPD side come out. I’ve shown great restraint on my part. I’m focusing on the negatives of the relationship instead of the positives and telling myself I don’t need that. 

I deleted his phone number, unfriended him, deleted all messages between us on fb messenger, deleted all of his pics. He never followed me on any other social media so that’s not a problem. I’ve almost completely wiped him out of my life. Only thing left to do is block him but I’ll only do that if he contacts me. 

I will be smart this time. I’m moving on, not dwelling on. It’s been a long time since I was able to say that. We’re going to be super busy over the summer months and that’s how I want it to be. Just living life, no time to dwell on the insignificant. This summer is about my daughters and I. My oldest is going off to high school and lots of stress. So I’ve got to make it as fun as I can around her marching band schedule. Her birthday is in July. She likes it low-key. I was hoping we’d be in our new apartment by then but I guess not. 

I’m doing a lot of sitting around, hurrying up and waiting. It’s driving me batty. 

I’m just hoping that here in a couple of weeks I have good news to pass on. 🤞🏼

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